I wrote today something that stirred lots of memories in me. I wrote my life since I was 4 on 2 pages of A4. It took 40 minutes and wow, lots of memories rose from somewhere and I now after reflecting on it, I need to get a copy and type it up and post it.
Writing for me is a way of clearing my mind and trying to relax from everything and by doing so, everything comes out and there is nothing left.
I don't have to write about the things that happen at work either directly or indirectly, or my personal life which can have the same kind of pressures and feelings to clear out the mind as it is not really fair on those I work with and for or the people I spend my time with. They are who they are and for that I am happy. The good goes with the bad and those that know me can see what I think and what I would really like to say or do. But alas, I am often reluctant to do those things to keep the peace. Oh but how I would like to.
In my old life, the one I left in England I was not known for my temper, just my lack of cheeryness which actually was a myth as when spoken too or when I talked, most people found actually I was alive. I do know exactly what is going, its all part of my way.
Anyway back to the point, I never got angry as that was often the wrong way to be, I became very honest and very direct and that often is more effective. However sometimes I did let go. I once reduced 3 teenage boys to tears in 5 minutes, made a grown man quit and walk out of a very highly paid job and had women literally beg me not to fire them. I ain't proud of those things at all, it was part of my job and who I had to be. I don't do angry. Not now. I certainly could not do that here.
Anger for me is not the answer as I wont go to someone else's level. I prefer my own. Control is important. More gets lost in 2 minutes of rage than a lifetime of talking and remaining in control.
Sometimes I feel like shouting at people stood at the top or bottom of escalators, people who stand in doorways so you can't get by, kick the cars that pull out and head toward you regardless, make the motorcyclist talking on his phone whilst riding brake suddenly and the list continues but I still remember the words from someone who was even more calm and patient than me.
'Let the person who is in a hurry be in a hurry and don't make it worse for them or you by slowing them down as you never know why they are in a hurry, it could be good news or it could be bad, so let them pass and wish them well"
The person that also said
"Never sit behind truck with symbols on the back of it that say corrosive, flammable, risk of death, etc or gas tanks/bottles as when they go up in flames so do you!!!"
"When you start work worry, when you leave work stop"
So wise and helpful.
I guess after all that writing my point has pretty much died out, mind that could be because of the Kopi Ya advert on TV which shows a motorcyclist with lots of eggs riding around and not breaking any. That is a true mystery of the orient thats for sure. Then so is buying eggs by the kilo.
There we go. Thats better